memes – Dan Q

Reply to: Who knows that you blog?

This is a reply to a post published elsewhere. Its content might be duplicated as a traditional comment at the original source.

David (Forking Mad+) said:

Question for the audience: Do you tell people you blog?

I was reflecting on this recently, after I inadvertently mentioned to a colleague that I had blogged about a topic a few days earlier. That, of course, started the questioning from them: Oh, what’s it called? What do you write about? Can I see it?

David (Forking Mad+)

This one’s been doing the rounds recently, and I’ve enjoyed seeing responses from RNotte, Kev, Alex, and others (there’s a longer list on David’s post).

I feel like my answer is different from those of many other participants: I’ve traditionally made no effort to keep my cyberspace and meatspace separate: probably everybody in my “offline” day-to-day life knows that I write here, and my “online” identity centres around the same central point too.

But lately, I’ve leaned harder on talking about it online. Most of my real-world friends had blogs at some point, but virtually all of those have also long-ago abandoned them¹, and along with that shift has come a disinterest in blogging and what it is (or can be) as well. Based on WhatsApp groups we share, most are happier reposting Facebook memes than sharing their own original thoughts in any kind of public forum.

(That said, it made my day when my friend Ele commented a couple of months ago. Hi, Ele!)

Anyway: I think that few would disagree that within popular culture, blogging has “had it’s day”. That’s not to say that there aren’t a great (and growing!) number of blogs out there: just that it’s not the popular touchstone that it was twenty years ago: data-harvesting social media silos have tragically become the “norm”, and for a blogger whose interest was targetting a specific audience… they need to go where the audience went.

Which I guess is something Kev was adjacent to when he said:

I tend to say “I enjoy writing” rather than “I have a blog.” And I think that’s because of the negative connotations blogging has with the general public.

I think some people tend to put “bloggers” in the same bucket as influencers, or podcasters. Which isn’t the case – many of us bloggers have no aspirations of influencing anything, we just like to share out thoughts on a medium we control.

Kev Quirk

This is the essence of it, I think. Blogging began as a way for people to write about… whatever they liked. But before long it also became a vehicle for marketing: “influencer bloggers” appeared and, let’s face it, made a bad name of it by making the popular expectation be that blogging is something you would do to make a living, rather than for the love of it. I’m not entirely surprised that so many people dropped blogging as a hobby rather than be clumped-in with them.²

But those same people had to jump platforms when social media silos became “the way” to advertise to a large audience, so now they’re all on Instagram, TikTok, and the like. The real personal bloggers – the ones who do it because blogging itself is the right medium for what they want to do – are still here. And, indeed, it feels like they’re in resurgence. Blogs are coming back, baby!³

The question was, though: who do I tell that I blog? And the answer is: absolutely anybody and everybody. But I mostly only make “subscribers” (a term I don’t terribly-much like, because it feels like it implies that increasing that number is some kind of “goal”) out of cyberspace friends, not meatspace friends, these days, I think.

But just sometimes, the worlds collide and somebody I see on the school run will talk about finding something of mine online, or somebody I meet through work will say that they read something I wrote, once. I enjoy these strange organic connections, but it can feel a little weird and awkward to be “recognised” unexpectedly.⁴

Footnotes

¹ I’m pretty sad about it, honestly! I miss seeing blog posts from people I know in “the real world”; I see some, but not many.

² It’s still a thing, of course, and I get countless requests for paid guest posts, ad placements, participation in link farming, and the like. And I’ve even had people ask me in person how I “monetise” my blog, as if making money from it was ever the goal!

³ Although probably never to the point where people will write about it as an up-and-coming phenomenon in a national newspaper, again. I think we’re past that stage.

⁴ Unexpected recognition also happens as a result of my work on FreeDeedPoll.org.uk and Three Rings, but these tend to be slightly easier to predict depending on the space I’m in. There are still surprise moments, though, and they’re still sometimes awkward at first!

A Random List of Silly Things I Hate

So apparently now this is a thing, so here I go:

Websites that are just blank pages if the JavaScript doesn’t load from the CDN.¹
The misunderstanding that LLMs can somehow be a route to AGI.
Computer systems that say my name is too short or my password is too long.²
People being unwilling to discuss their wild claims later using the lack of discussion as evidence of widespread acceptance.
When people balance the new toilet roll one atop the old one’s tube.³

A nearly-full roll of toilet paper perched atop an empty toilet roll tube on an open-ended spindle. — Come on! It would have been *so easy*!

Shellfish. Why would you eat that!?
People assuming my interest in computers and technology means I want to talk to them about cryptocurrencies.⁴
Websites that nag you to install their shitty app. (I know you have an app. I’m choosing to use your website. Stop with the banners!)
People who seem to only be able to drive at one speed.⁵
The assumption that the fact I’m “sharing” my partner is some kind of compromise on my part; a concession; something that I’d “wish away” if I could. (It’s very much not.)
Brexit.

Wow, that was strangely cathartic.

Footnotes

¹ I have a special pet hate for websites that require JavaScript to render their images. Like… we’d had the <img> tag since 1993! Why are you throwing it away and replacing it with something objectively slower, more-brittle, and less-accessible?

² Or, worse yet, claiming that my long, random password is insecure because it contains my surname. I get that composition-based password rules, while terrible (even when they’re correctly implemented, which they’re often not), are a moderately useful model for people to whom you’d otherwise struggle to explain password complexity. I get that a password composed entirely of personal information about the owner is a bad idea too. But there’s a correct way to do this, and it’s not “ban passwords with forbidden words in them”. Here’s what you should do: first, strip any forbidden words from the password: you might need to make multiple passes. Second, validate the resulting password against your composition rules. If it fails, then yes: the password isn’t good enough. If it passes, then it doesn’t matter that forbidden words were in it: a properly-stored and used password is never made less-secure by the addition of extra information into it!

³ This is the worst of the toilet paper crimes, but there’s a lesser but more-common offence.

⁴ Also: I’m uninterested in whatever multiplayer shooter game you’re playing, and no I won’t fix your printer.

⁵ “You were doing 35mph in the 60mph limit, then you were doing 35mph in the 40mph limit, now you’re doing 35mph in the 20mph limit. Argh!”

67 Bananas

I think my “six seven”-obsessed younger child was in the kitchen with a biro earlier. How do I know, you ask?

Ten Pointless Facts About Me

This has been doing the rounds; I last saw it on Kev’s blog. I like that the social blogosphere’s doing this kind of fun activity again, these days¹.

1. Do you floss your teeth?

Umm… sometimes? Not as often as I should. Don’t tell my dentist!

Usually at least once a month, never more than once a week. I really took to heart some advice that if you’re using a fluoridated mouthwash then you shouldn’t do it close to when you brush your teeth (or you counteract the benefits), so my routine is that… when I remember and can be bothered to floss… I’ll floss and mouthwash, but like in the middle of the day.

And since I moved my bedroom (and bathroom) one floor further up our house, it’s harder to find the motivation to do so! So I’m probably flossing less. The unanticipated knock-on effect of extending your house!

2. Tea, coffee, or water?

I love a coffee to start a workday, but I have to be careful how much I consume because caffeine hits me pretty hard, even after a concentrated effort over the last 10 years or so to gradually increase my tolerance. I can manage a couple of mugs in the morning and be fine, now, but three coffees… or any in the mid-afternoon onwards… and I’m at risk of throwing off my ability to sleep later².

I keep a bottle of water wherever I work to try to encourage myself to hydrate, because I’ve got medical evidence to show that I don’t drink enough water! It sometimes works.

3. Footwear preference?

Basic trainers for everyday use; comfortable boots for hiking; slippers for when I’m working. Nothing special.

I wear holes in footwear (and everything else I wear) faster than anybody I know, so nowadays I go for good-value comfort over any other considerations when buying shoes.

A French Bulldog looks-on guiltily at a hand holding the remains of a pair of slippers that have been thoroughly shredded. — One time it was the dog’s fault that my footwear fell apart, but usually they do so by themselves.

4. Favourite dessert?

Varies, but if we’re eating out, I’m probably going to be ordering the most-chocolatey dessert on the menu.

5. The first thing you do when you wake up?

The very first thing I do when I wake up is check how long it is before I need to get up, and make a decision about when I’m going to do so. I almost never need my alarm to wake me: I routinely wake up half an hour or so before my alarm would go off, most mornings. But exactly how early I wake directly impacts what I do next. If I’m well-rested and it’s early enough, I’ll plan on getting up and doing something productive: an early start to work, or some voluntary work for Three Rings, or some correspondence. If it’s close to the time I need to get up I’ll more-often just stay in bed and spend longer doing the actual answer I should give…

…because the “real” answer is probably: pick up my phone, and open up FreshRSS – almost always the first and last thing I do online in a day! I’ll skim the news and blogosphere and “set aside” for later anything I’d like to re-read or look at later on.

6. Age you’d like to stick at?

Honestly, I’m good where I am, thanks.

Sure, I was fitter and healthier in my 20s, and I had more free time in my early 30s… and there are certainly things I miss and get nostalgic about in any era of my life. But conversely: it took me a long, long time to “get my shit together” to the level I have now, and I wouldn’t want to have to go through all of the various bits of self-growth, therapy, etc. all over again!

So… sure, I’d be happy to transplant my intellect into 20-year-old me and take advantage of my higher energy level of the time for an extra decade or so³. But I wouldn’t go back even a decade if it meant that I had to go relearn and go through everything from that decade another time, no thanks!

7. How many hats do you own?

Four. Ish.

They are:

A bandana. Actually, I own maybe half a dozen bandanas, mostly in Pride rainbow colours. Bandanas are amazingly versatile: they fold small which suits my love of travelling light these last few years, they can function as headgear, dust mask, neckerchief, flannel, etc.⁴, and they do a pretty good job of keeping my head cool and protecting my growing bald spot from the fierce rays of the summer sun.
A “geek” hat. Okay, I’ve actually got three of these, too, in slightly different designs. When they first started appearing at Oxford Geek Nights, I just kept winning them! I’m not a huge fan of caps, so mostly the kids wear them… although I do put one on when I’m collecting takeaway food so I can get away with just putting e.g. “geek hat” in the “name” field, rather than my name⁵.
A warm hat that comes out only when the weather is incredibly cold, or when I’m skiing. As I was reminded while skiing on my recent trip to Finland, I should probably switch to wearing a helmet when I ski, but I’ve been skiing for three to four decades without one and I find the habit hard to break.⁶
A wooly hat that I was given by a previous employer at a meetup in Mexico last year. I wore it a couple of times last winter but it’s otherwise not seen much use.

8. Describe the last photo you took?

The last photo I took was of myself wearing a “geek” hat. You’ve seen it, it’s above!

But the one before that was this picture of an extremely large bottle of champagne, with a banana for scale, that was delivered to my house earlier today:

A six-litre bottle of champagne, wrapped in bubble wrap and surrounded by packing peanuts, in a wooden transport case, with a banana resting atop it. — A 6-litre champagne bottle is properly-termed a Methuselah, after Noah’s grandad I guess.

Ruth and JTA celebrate their anniversary every few years with the “next size up” of champagne bottle, and this is the one they’re up to. This year, merely asking me to help them drink it probably won’t be sufficient (that’d still be two litres each!) so we’re probably going to have to get some friends over.

I took the photo to send to Ruth to reassure her that the bottle had arrived safely, after the previous attempt went… less well. I added the banana “for scale” before sharing the photo with some other friends, too.

A wooden case containing a completely smashed 6-litre champagne bottle. — The previous delivery… didn’t go so well. 😱

9. Worst TV show?

PAW Patrol. No doubt.

You know all those 1980s kids TV shows that basically existed for no other purpose than as a marketing vehicle for a range of toys? I’m talking He-Man (and She-Ra), Transformers, G.I. Joe, Care Bears, M.A.S.K., Rainbow Brite, and My Little Pony. Well, those shows look good compared to PAW Patrol.

3D render of a boy and six dogs (each dressed as a representative of a different service) - the PAW Patrol. Ugh. — Six pups, each endowed with exactly one personality trait⁷ but a plethora of accessories and vehicles which expands every season so that no matter how many toys you’ve got, y0u’re always behind the curve.

I was delighted when our kids graduated from PAW Patrol to My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic because it’s an enormously better show (the songs kick ass, too) and we could finally shake off the hollow, pointless, internally-inconsistent advertisement that is PAW Patrol.

10. As a child, what was your aspiration for adulthood?

This is the single most-boring thing about me, and I’ve doubtless talked about it before. At some point between the age of about six and eight years old, I decided that I wanted to grow up and become… a computer programmer.

And then I designed the entirety of the rest of my education around that goal. I learned a variety of languages and paradigms under my own steam while setting myself up for a GCSE in IT, and then A-Levels in Maths and Computing, and then a Degree in Computer Science, and by the time I’d done all of that I was already working in the industry: self-actualised by 21.

Like I said: boring!

Your turn!

You should give this pointless quiz a go too. Ping/Webmention me if you do (or comment below, I suppose); I’d love to read what you write.

Footnotes

¹ They’re internet memes, in the traditional sense, but sadly people usually use “meme” nowadays exclusively to describe image memes, and not other kinds of memetic Internet content. Just another example of our changing Internet language, which I’ve written about before. Sometimes they were silly quizzes (wanna know what Meat Loaf song I am?); sometimes they were about you and your friends. But images, they weren’t: that came later.

² Or else I’ll get a proper jittery heart-flutter going!

³ I wouldn’t necessarily even miss the always-on, in-your-pocket, high-speed Internet of today: the Internet was pretty great back then, too!

⁴ Obviously an intergalactic hitch-hiker should include a bandana, perhaps as well as an equally-versatile towel, in their toolkit.

⁵ It’s not about privacy, although that’s a fringe benefit I suppose: mostly it’s about getting my food quicker! If I walk into Dominos wearing a geek hat and they’ve got pizza on the counter with a label on it that says it’s for “geek hat”, they’ll just hand it over, no questions, and I’m in-and-out in seconds.

⁶ JTA observed that similar excuses were used by people who resisted the rollout of mandatory seatbelt usage in cars, so possibly I’m the “bad guy” here.

⁷ From left to right, the single personality traits for each of the pups are (a) doesn’t like water, (b) is female, (c) likes naps, (d) is allergic to cats, (e) is clumsy, and (f) is completely fucking pointless.

Blog Questions Challenge

Since Kev Quirk made an adaptation of Ava‘s Blog Questions Challenge I’ve been seeing it everywhere in my blogosphere circle. I’ve gotta be the last person left on Earth to do it, but it has that old-school pass-it-along meme feel, like that 2006 one about describing your friends. I’ve not been tagged by name, but both Jeremy and Garrett did a broad “you” tag, so I’m taking it.

Why did you start blogging in the first place?

It felt like a natural evolution of my second vanity-site. It was 1998, and my site – Castle of the Four Winds – was home to a selection of the same kinds of random crap that everybody put on their homepages at the time. I figured I’d start keeping an online diary: the word “blog” hadn’t been coined yet, and its predecessor “weblog” had only been around for a year and I hadn’t come across it.

So I experimentally started posting a few times a week.

By the way, if you liked how my site looked back in the 1990s, you can wind the clock back! Give it a go!

What platform are you using to manage your blog and why did you choose it? Have you blogged on other platforms before?

1998: Static HTML and a bit of Perl

When I started blogging my site was almost entirely plain HTML². So my original “platform” was probably Emacs.

2000: Static files indexed by PHP

In the Summer of 2000 I registered avangel.com and moved my diary there. I was still storing posts in static files, but used PHP wrappers to share the structure and menus across the pages. It was a massive improvement.

Later, I moved everything to the (ill-advised?) domain name scatmania.org and reimplemented in pretty-much the same way. Until…

2003: Flip

The first real “blogging engine” I used was Flip.

I liked Flip³: it had a raw simplicity that I’d later come to love in young versions of WordPress. And being able to edit from the Web was a huge improvement over having to edit files, especially when I was out and about: I managed to post from my dad’s BlackBerry while cycling across the Outer Hebrides, for example.

2004: WordPress

I’d have outgrown Flip eventually, but I got a nudge in that direction in July 2004. At the time, I was sharing a server with some friends and operated by Gareth, and something went wrong and the server went completely offline. The co-located server disappeared back to Gareth’s house, eventually, and while I’d recovered many of the posts from my own backups, 61 posts remain partially-incomplete to this day (if you happen to have a copy of any of them I’d love to see it!).

I brought my blog back online using WordPress, whose then-new release version 1.2 included an RSS-powered importer: this allowed me to write a little code to convert my entire previous archive into a fat RSS file and then import it wholesale. WordPress was, as remains, pretty magical – a universal blogging platform that evolved into a universal CMS – and I back in the day I occasionally argued online with Matt about technical aspects of the future direction of the project⁴.

Incidentally, if you’d like to see more of my blog’s design history over the last 26+ years, I shared a lot of screenshots back in 2018.

If you didn’t know better, you might well not know I’m running WordPress. My theme and custom plugins are… well, they’re an ecosystem all by themselves. And that’s before you even get to things like CapsulePress, my WordPress-to-Gopher/Gemini/Spartan/Nex bridge, the pile of scripts I use to sync-up with the Fediverse, the PWA I use to post notes while I’m on the move, and so on.

2025: ClassicPress

Earlier this year I experimentally switched to ClassicPress; a fork of WordPress. There’ll doubtless be lots more to say about that, down the line⁵, but here’s the skinny: I don’t use Gutenberg on my blog anyway⁶, I appreciate having my backend be almost as high-performance as I’ve worked to make my frontend, and I enjoy most of the feature differences⁷.

How do you write your posts? For example, in a local editing tool, or in a panel/dashboard that’s part of your blog?

With the exception of notes (most of which are written in a tool of my own creation and then pushed to one or both of my Mastodon and my blog simultaneously), I mostly write right into the WordPress/ClassicPress post editor.

I often write ideas, concepts, and first drafts into my Obsidian notebook and then copy/paste out when the time comes.

When do you feel most inspired to write?

There’s no particular pattern, though it feels like I’m most-inspired to write exactly when I should be prioritising something else! That’s why it’s so helpful to be able to write three sentences into Obsidian and then come back to it later!

I’ve been on a bit of a blogging kick these last few years, though. Last year I wrote a massive 436 posts, although that admittedly includes PESOS‘d checkins from geocaching and geohashing expeditions. I’m a fan of Kev’s #100DaysToOffload challenge, and I’m on course to achieve it earlier than ever before, this year (my sixth consecutive year: I do the challenge strictly by calendar years!), as this post is already by 48th… all within the first 38 days of this year⁸.

Do you publish immediately after writing, or do you let it simmer a bit as a draft?

A mixture of both. Probably most of my posts are written in a single sitting… or, at least, are written in a tab that stays open for the entire time during which it’s written.

But others spend a long time in-progress. You remember how almost a year ago I gave a talk about why Oxford’s area code is 01865? And I promised that there’d be a blog/vlog/maybe-podcast version of that talk later? Yeah: that’s been 90%-there and sitting in a draft pretty-much since then, just waiting for me to make the finishing touches (and record the vlog/podcast variants, if that’s the direction I decide to go in).

And I’ve dusted off drafts that’ve been much older than that, before, too. So it really is a mixture.

What’s your favourite post on your blog?

I couldn’t pick out a favourite that I wouldn’t change my mind about five minutes later. But a recent favourite might have been last Spring’s “Let Your Players Lead The Way”, which aimed to impart some of the things I’ve learned about gamemastering (especially) while being the dungeon master for The Levellers these last few years⁹.

Not only was it a post that had been a long time coming, and based on months of drafts and re-drafts, but also I really enjoyed writing some post-specific CSS to give it just a slightly more-magical feel.

Screenshot from Let Your Players Lead The Way, showcasing its design in the style of the D&D Players' Handbook. — The downside is that I’ve now got one more thing to try not to break the next time I re-write my blog’s stylesheet.

Any future plans for your blog? Maybe a redesign, a move to another platform, or adding a new feature?

I want to redesign the homepage to be simpler, less-graphical, and more-informational. I’m not sure how that’s going to look, yet.

I’ve been wondering about integrating some of my personal-geotracking into the design (Aaron Parecki does an amazing job of this with his dynamic site background image, for example).

I’m playing with the idea of adding a guestbook, like it’s 1998 again or something.

I’d like to tidy up my tagging taxonomy, and I’m not convinced AI is up to the task.

I need to decide how I feel about the emoji reactions feature I added in 2023. I’m still undecided. What do you think? 👍? 👎?

And as I mentioned: I’m experimenting with ClassicPress. It’s working out mostly-okay so far, but that’s a story for another post.

Next?

I feel like I’m the last person in the universe to do this quiz. But if you haven’t – and you have anything approximating a blog – then you should go next.

Footnotes

¹ I wouldn’t recommend actually reading my older posts, though. I was a teenager, and it shows.

² I had a slightly-fancier kind of hosting, by this point, that gave me a cgi-bin directory into which I could compile binaries (in C) or write scripts (in Perl). My hit counter? That was a Perl script I adapted from Matt Wright’s counter.pl and “enhanced” with some flaming text using Corel Photo-Paint.

³ While writing this post, I hunted down the original developer of Flip. He seems cool.

⁴ A year later he launched WordPress.com, which then evolved into the foundation of Automattic, and there soon came a point where I thought “I should work there, someday!” It took me a further 14 years before I applied for such a job, though.

⁵ Right off the bat, though, let me stress that trying ClassicPress is absolutely nothing to do with the drama in the WordPress space right now: in fact I’ve been planning to give it a try ever since the project got its shit together, re-forked WordPress, and released ClassicPress 2.0 a year ago.

⁶ I don’t have anything against Gutenberg – I use it on other blogs, and every day at work! – and Block Themes are magical… but I’ve never found any benefit to them here: I’ve no need for it, and I’ve got plugins I’ve written for my own use that I’ve never bothered to make Gutenberg-compatible.

⁷ My biggest gripe with ClassicPress so far is that in removing the jQuery dependency on the post editor’s tag selector they’ve only replaced it with a <datalist>, which is neat and all but kills the ability to autocomplete multiple comma-separated tags at once. But it looks like that’s getting fixed, so I’m going to hang in there for a bit before I decide whether I’m sticking with ClassicPress or not.

⁸ I’ll save you from doing the maths: if I complete 48 posts in 38 days, I’d expect to complete 100 posts on my 80th day: as it’s not a leap year, that would be Friday 21 March 2025. Let’s see how I get on!

⁹ Although I’ve been horribly neglecting them for the last couple of months, for various reasons.

My Default Apps at the End of 2023

Kev Quirk, Colin Walker, and other cool kids I follow online made it sound fun to share your “lifestack” as we approach the end of 2023.

So here’s mine: my digital “everyday carry” list of the tools and services I routinely use:

📨 Mail Service: Proton Mail
📮 Mail Client: Thunderbird (Desktop), Proton Mail App (Android), Proton Mail webmail (anywhere else)
📝 Notes: Obsidian, Syncthing (for cross-device sync)
✅ To-Do: Obsidian, physical notepad [not happy with this; want something more productive]
📆 Calendar: Google Calendar (via Thunderbird on Desktop) [not happy with this; want something not-Google – still waiting on Proton Calendar getting good!]
🙍🏻‍♂️ Contacts: Proton Mail
📖 RSS Service: FreshRSS, selfhosted
🗞️ RSS Client: FreshRSS (Desktop), FeedMe (Android)
⌨️ Launcher: RayCast (MacOS), PowerToys Run (Windows)
☁️ Cloud storage: ownCloud (selfhosted)
🌅 Photo library: plain old directories! [would like: something selfhosted, mostly filesystem-driven, with Web interface]
🌐 Web Browser: Firefox (everywhere)
💬 Chat: Slack, WhatsApp, Signal, Telegram
🔖 Bookmarks: Firefox (easy access), Wallabag (selfhosted, for long-term archiving)
📚 Reading: dead tree format [my Kindle v2 died and I’m seeking a non-Amazon replacement; suggestions welcome], Calibre
📜 Word Processing: Microsoft Word, Google Docs
📈 Spreadsheets: Microsoft Excel, Google Sheets
📊 Presentations: reveal.js
🛒 Shopping Lists: pen and paper
💰 Personal Finance: Google Sheets
🎵 Music: YouTube Music [not entirely happy with it; considering replacement]
🎤 Podcasts: FreshRSS; experimenting with Pocket Casts
🔐 Password Management: KeePassXC, Syncthing (for cross-device sync)
🤦‍♂️ Social Media: Mastodon, selfhosted
🔎 Search: DuckDuckGo
🧮 Code Editor: Sublime Text
⌨️ KVM: Barrier
🗺️ Navigation: OpenStreetMap, Google Maps, Talkietoaster (Garmin Montana)
📍 Location Tracking: uLogger
🔗 Blog: WordPress, selfhosted

Breakups as HTTP Response Codes

103: Early Hints ("I'm not sure this can last forever.") — 103: Early Hints (“I’m not sure this can last forever.”)

300: Multiple Choices ("There are so many ways I can do better than you.") — 300: Multiple Choices (“There are so many ways I can do better than you.”)

303: See Other ("You should date other people.") — 303: See Other (“You should date other people.”)

304: Not Modified ("With you, I feel like I'm stagnating.") — 304: Not Modified (“With you, I feel like I’m stagnating.”)

402: Payment Required ("I am a prostitute.") — 402: Payment Required (“I am a prostitute.”)

403: Forbidden ("You don't get this any more.") — 403: Forbidden (“You don’t get this any more.”)

406: Not Acceptable ("I could never introduce you to my parents.") — 406: Not Acceptable (“I could never introduce you to my parents.”)

408: Request Timeout ("You keep saying you'll propose but you never do.") — 408: Request Timeout (“You keep saying you’ll propose but you never do.”)

409: Conflict ("We hate each other.") — 409: Conflict (“We hate each other.”)

411: Length Required ("Your penis is too small.") — 411: Length Required (“Your penis is too small.”)

413: Payload Too Large ("Your penis is too big.") — 413: Payload Too Large (“Your penis is too big.”)

416: Range Not Satisfied ("Our sex life is boring and repretitive.") — 416: Range Not Satisfied (“Our sex life is boring and repretitive.”)

425: Too Early ("Your premature ejaculation is a problem.") — 425: Too Early (“Your premature ejaculation is a problem.”)

428: Precondition Failed ("You're still sleeping with your ex-!?") — 428: Precondition Failed (“You’re still sleeping with your ex-!?”)

429: Too Many Requests ("You're so demanding!") — 429: Too Many Requests (“You’re so demanding!”)

451: Unavailable for Legal Reasons ("I'm married to somebody else.") — 451: Unavailable for Legal Reasons (“I’m married to somebody else.”)

502: Bad Gateway ("Your pussy is awful.") — 502: Bad Gateway (“Your pussy is awful.”)

508: Loop Detected ("We just keep fighting.") — 508: Loop Detected (“We just keep fighting.”)

With thanks to Ruth for the conversation that inspired these pictures, and apologies to the rest of the Internet for creating them.

Sierra Death Generator

This is a repost promoting content originally published elsewhere. See more things Dan's reposted.

Sierra Death Generator

For all of your screenshot/death scene meme needs.

EDIT.COM showing the source code of THIS web page. — Also, y’know, being meta.

How Russia’s Hilarious, Homoerotic “Satisfaction” Became a Nationwide Meme of Solidarity

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How Russia’s Hilarious, Homoerotic “Satisfaction” Became a Nationwide Meme of Solidarity (The New Yorker)

Masha Gessen writes about a series of recent recent Russian parody videos, started by air-transport cadets as a spoof of the music video for “Satisfaction,” by Benny Benassi, from 2002.

A few weeks ago, fourteen Russian first-year air-transport cadets made a parody of a fifteen-year-old music clip, and now it’s all a lot of Russians can talk about. This is a story of spontaneous solidarity, self-organization, and, ultimately, just possibly, the triumph of freedom over bureaucracy.

The original clip, set to the 2002 track “Satisfaction,” by the Italian d.j. Benny Benassi, is itself a parody: of music videos, erotica, and advertising. It features a series of scantily clad young women working with tools, starting with a hammer and graduating to a masonry drill, a belt sander, and an angle grinder. The screen features names and technical descriptions of the tools while the women pose with their bodies contorted and their mouths open, as though they were in a Victoria’s Secret catalogue. In their parody, the air-transport cadets used an all-male cast, the interior of a well-worn student dorm, and the kinds of tools that are found there: a broom, a clothes iron, a spray jar of glass cleaner. Mostly, though, they used their own very young bodies, dressed in underwear, with belts, neckties, and military caps arranged in apparent homage to Tom of Finland.

…

Masha Gessen (The New Yorker)

I Have a Confession to Make

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I Have a Confession to Make | Rob Sheridan on Patreon (Patreon)

Official Post from Rob Sheridan: That goober you see above is me as a nerdy high school kid in my bedroom in 1998, being interviewed on TV for a dumb website I made. Allow me to explain.20 years ago this month, an episode of the TV show Ally McBeal featured a strange animated baby dancing the cha-cha in a vision experienced by the

That goober you see above is me as a nerdy high school kid in my bedroom in 1998, being interviewed on TV for a dumb website I made. Allow me to explain.

20 years ago this month, an episode of the TV show Ally McBeal featured a strange animated baby dancing the cha-cha in a vision experienced by the show’s titular character. It immediately became an unlikely pop culture sensation, and by the tail end of the 90s you couldn’t pass a mall t-shirt kiosk or a Spencer’s Gifts without seeing corny merchandise for The Dancing Baby, or “Oogachaka Baby” as it was sometimes known. This child of the Uncanny Valley was an offensively banal phenomenon: It had no depth, no meaning, no commentary, no narrative. It was just a dumb video loop from the internet, something your nerdiest co-worker would have emailed you for a ten-second chuckle. We know these frivolous bite-sized jokes as memes now, and they’re wildly pervasive in popular culture. You can get every type of Grumpy Cat merchandise imaginable, for example, despite the property being nothing more than a photo of a cranky-looking feline with some added text. We know what memes are in 2018 but in 1997, we didn’t. The breathtaking stupidity of The Dancing Baby’s popularity was a strange development with online origins that had no cultural precedent. It’s a cringe-worthy thing to look back on, appropriately relegated to the dumpster of regrettable 90s fads. But I have a confession to make: The Dancing Baby was kinda my fault.

…

Rob Sheridan (Patreon)

Internet memes of the 1990s were a very different beast to those you see today. A combination of the slow connection speeds, lower population of “netizens” (can you believe we used to call ourselves that), and the fact that many of the things we take for granted today were then cutting-edge or experimental technologies like animated GIFs or web pages with music means that memes spread more-slowly and lived for longer. Whereas today a meme can be born and die in the fraction of a heartbeat that it takes for you to discover them, the memes of 1990s grew gradually and truly organically: there was not yet any market for attempting to “manufacture” a meme. If if you were thoroughly plugged-in to Net culture, by the time you discovered a new meme it could be weeks or months old and still thriving, and spin-off memes (like the dozens of sites that followed the theme of the Hampster Dance) almost existed to pay homage to the originals, rather than in an effort to supplant them.

I’m aware that meme culture predates the dancing baby, and I had the privilege of seeing it foster on e.g. newsgroups beforehand. But the early Web provided a fascinating breeding ground for a new kind of meme: one that brushed up against mainstream culture and helped to put the Internet onto more people’s mental maps: consider the media reaction to the appearance of the Dancing Baby on Ally McBeal. So as much as you might want to wrap your hands around the throat of the greasy teenager in the picture, above, I think that in a way we should be thanking him for his admittedly-accidental work in helping bring geek culture into the sight of popular culture.

And I’m not just saying that because I, too, spent the latter half of the 1990s putting things online that I ought to by right have been embarassed by in hindsight. ;-)

Historical generals pointing out the toilets: a short thread

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Jonathan Healey on Twitter (Twitter)

Historical generals pointing out the toilets: a short thread.pic.twitter.com/WYzsnRlszj

Jonathan Healey (@SocialHistoryOx)

[COMIC] Paused Season 4 Episode 6; couldn’t help but think…

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The original link was: https://i.imgur.com/FFP01v3.jpg

Eyebombing

I’ve been sticky googly eyes to things.

(it looks like one of the robot’s eyes fell off before the bar‘s owners Instragram’d it)

There are those who would argue that this isn’t true eyebombing, because I ought to be sticking eyes to non-anthropomorphic, inanimate objects, and making them look alive by doing so. But the folks on /r/eyebombing don’t seem to mind: they’re far more-focused on the chaos and hilarity that ensues when you just put eyes on any damn thing that looks like it could benefit from them.

When I was on holiday in Jersey, for example, I found an unattended rack of tourist information leaflets that were just crying out for a ‘bombing.

And because I pretty-much carry googly eyes around with me all the time – in the pocket that generally contains my headphones, a pen, a hair tie, and other everyday essentials – I started sticking eyes onto things.

The game didn’t stop even when I touched back down on the mainland.

Where next…

How I feel getting myself off.

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The original link was: http://i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/150/505/f30fd24c56e1bcfc926883d6a51d5a00.gif

At Last

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At Last (matt-inthe-hat.livejournal.com)

Rating of posts in LiveJournal blogs. LJ Top is automatically generated.

In the same vein as I had the previous month and Matt promised to for a long while, Matt eventually completed the meme in which he replied to me, and various other friends, with (1) something random about me, (2) a challenge, (3) a colour, (4) something he likes, (5) an early or clear memory, (6) an animal, and (7) a question he’d always wanted answered. He wrote:

…

Dan

1. Your hair is longer than mine was. I was intimidated.
2. I don’t know how much Buddhism you’ve studied. If it’s a little then study some more and try some meditation. If you have studied Buddhism then learn to unicycle.
3. A light blue.
4. JTA mentioned it once in his blog and it stuck with me as a perfect example of one of your best characteristics: he called early one morning and asked if he and Ruth could stay on your sofa. Rather than asking what happened and if they were all right you said yes, got the bed ready and put the kettle on. Many people, when helping someone, want to fix the problem and force their help and solutions on others. You don’t and it’s refreshing.
5. My earliest memory was the pre-training meeting. My clearest was about a year later when I shamed myself in how I treated you. I apologised but I don’t think I apologised enough. I’m sorry.
6. If you were shorter you’d probably be an Ewok.
7. You’ve always seemed relaxed and easy about how attached you are to things, but do you plan on leaving Aberystwyth? Would you object to it if Claire suggested it? Where would you live otherwise? I know that’s three questions but I don’t care.

…

– Matt Reynolds

I responded almost immediately:

1. Aww. Someday I’ll get it cut and it’ll be less-long than yours was in it’s hayday.
2. Quite a lot. Unicycle it is, then.
…
7. Have always promised myself I’d leave before 10 years was up, and I’m still – give or take – planning to stick to that. Claire seems to approve, and even encourages it. We have a few ideas as to what we’ll do after we graduate: one idea that’s being knocked around is to move to Aberdeen, where she can get involved with the university (perhaps a postgraduateship).

– Dan Q

Update – 27 February 2019: I replied again, to update on progress.

7. And I managed, give or take, although it wasn’t in Claire’s wake but despite it.

2. I’ve tried a few times but I’m going to have to give up. My unicycle’s sat rusting in the shed; I don’t think I’m ever gonna crack this one, sorry.

– Dan Q

So yeah. Still can’t unicycle.